The One Thing You Can Do to Catapult Yourself Into Your Best Life

Two and a half years ago I was on a path toward living my best life. Things were looking really good for me career-wise and I was super excited for what was to come. Then the pandemic hit. Like most people, how I was living my life changed. I fell off the track for a while, but I’ve found my way back.

Has this ever happened to you? Want to know how to get back on track? Take a listen to today's podcast or read the transcript below. I'm sharing THE ONE THING you can do to catapult yourself into your best life……

I'm sharing.....

- What that one thing is
- Why you need to do it
- Strategies to make the process as easy as possible and
- The speech I didn’t get to give at the 2020 Woman on Fire Summit

You can listen here or read the transcript below.

LISTEN TO THE PODCAST

PODCAST EPISODE TRANSCRIPT

Did the pandemic slow you down and get in the way of your goals? Want to know how to get back on track? Take a listen to today's podcast. I'm sharing the one thing you can do to start living the life you've always wanted.

Hi. Welcome to lessons on happiness us. I'm your host, Val Malnar, and I'm here to talk to you about finding happiness through healing, personal growth, and mindset practice. My hope is that by sharing my story and the methods I've used to become a happier person, I can help you on your journey to do the same. Thanks so much for tuning in, and I hope you enjoy the show.

Hello, beautiful people. Today I'm going to tell you the one thing you can do to catapult yourself into your best life by sharing the speech that I was going to, but never got to give at the 2020 Woman on Fire Summit featuring Gabby Bernstein, Lisa Nichols, and other amazing thought leaders. Today I'm going to share with you what that one thing is, why you need to do it, and give you five strategies on how to make the process as easy as possible. All right, let's get to it. Here's the speech that I was going to give back in 2020 at the Woman on Fire Summit in Toronto.

“What if I told you that every woman sitting in this room could transform their life….today? You might wonder where I get off making such a claim. Well, I'm here to tell you my story so that you can see that transformation is possible if you just take action. Before we get started, I just want to say that I'm not special. I'm just a regular girl.

I'm smart, but I'm not the smartest among my friends. I'm driven, but I struggle with self-confidence, I'm good with people, but I'm also a little bit socially awkward. I work really hard, but there's definitely people out there who work harder. I tell you this so that you know that if I can transform my life, so can you. Eight weeks ago, I attended the Atelier Collective event in Niagara on the Lake.

One of the first speakers at the event was peak performance coach Hina Khan. Hina asked us all to do a visualization exercise around goal setting, and after the exercise, she asked if anyone had an emotional response to the activity. A few women raised their hands, and one shared that she was really emotional because her vision was unclear and that upset her. And then another woman shared that she had the exact same experience. After that, Hina asked us if anyone had a really clear vision after doing an exercise, and several women raised their hands, and I was one of them.

Hina called on me to share what I saw. Now, before I tell you what I saw, I'd like to tell you about the events that led up to that particular moment. I had just come off my busiest year of work as a virtual interior designer and educator. And even though it was my busiest year in terms of revenue, I was nowhere near the income goal that I had set for myself. I felt deflated and like a failure.

I couldn't figure out why I was working so hard but not making the money that I had dreamed about making. When I first decided to start my business, I was so frustrated. I'd been working 60 hours a week for the last two and a half years building my business, and I loved it. But I was building this business so that I would have more time to spend with my family while finally getting paid what I thought I deserved. Only I didn't have more time with my family and I didn't earn what I thought I should have.

So I got busy trying to figure out why. See, in the past, whenever I'd go through a personal struggle, I'd always research everything I could about what I was feeling, why I was feeling it, and how I could overcome it. It was helpful to me to know that others shared my feelings enough that they wrote about it and I identified with their stories and experiences. And I loved learning how I could implement their strategies into my own life. However, this time was different.

I was approaching my 44th birthday and I noticed a recurring pattern in my career. I noticed that no matter what job I had and no matter what industry I was in, I always seemed to be one of the hardest workers, given the most responsibility, but then not adequately compensated for all my efforts and dedication. I blamed it on who I worked for. I thought I always took work from people who like to take advantage of me. But now, here I was, two and a half years into my own business, working really long hours with the most responsibility that I have ever had in a position and barely making ends meet.

So I started reading again, listening to podcasts, watching videos, and I even got a coach vowing that this time I would figure my shit out and get my life on track. So that's what I did. That and something different. Not only did I read the books, listen to the podcast, watch the videos, and take guidance from my coach, but I took serious action. See, in the past, when I had looked to others for mentorship, I would voraciously consume all of the information that they share with me.

I'd keep it in my mind and I'd talk about it with friends and I'd try to stay positive. But there was a piece of the puzzle that I missed every single time. You probably already know this, but often self-development books and coaches provide you with exercises designed to help you focus and define your goals and dreams. But in the past, I didn't do all of the exercises. To be fair, I would eagerly start then, but halfway through, I'd tell myself I'll do it later, because either I had to get to another task, or I just wanted to continue consuming and learning everything I possibly could right now. But then, guess what? I'd never get to it. I’d justify my inaction by telling myself that the information is in my brain and I'll remember it, and I'll be mindful of how I live my life moving forward.

Now, let me explain. I wasn't being lazy. I just had something else to do that seemed more important at the time. I had to get a client project out the door. I had to get to the next blog post. I had to drum up more business to pay the bills. I had to get the kids breakfast and off to school, whatever. Something else always seemed to take priority. So I didn't actually physically do what was recommended by each author, mentor, or coach. However, this time I promised myself that I would do the work. And that's when my life changed.

I started doing the work on January 7, 2020, after the kids were back in school and I had a fresh new start to the new year. I went back to my favorite books and videos and started doing all of the exercises. I started writing down my goals, not just thinking about them. And I hired a coach to help guide me and keep me on track. She helped me see past my short-term goals and focus on the long haul.

I started actually telling people about what I really wanted to do and channeling the energy that I'd feel. Once I achieved my ultimate goal, I did all the things. I was invested. I was ready to change my life. I was sick and tired of living my same old story.

So on February 8, 2020, almost exactly one month after taking my intentional action, my life changed. Earlier, I started telling you that Hina Khan asked me to share what my vision was after the goal-setting exercise, and now I'm ready to share that with you. I told Hina that I saw myself standing on a stage motivating women much like she was, but on a grander stage, because this was more of an intimate event. A Rachel Hollis kind of stage is what I said. I told her that I wanted to help women realize and own their greatness and set out to achieve their deepest dreams and desires.

What happened next was so incredible. Hina called me up onto the stage and told the crowd that she was, and they were, going to help make my dreams become reality. She gave me a mic and asked me to thank the crowd as if I had just given the most powerful speech of my life. She told the women at the conference to clap as if they'd never been so motivated. I'll admit, I was pretty nervous and I felt really self-conscious, but I had been doing all the work this time, and I had committed to myself to take action.

So I got into full character and yelled into that microphone, thank you all for coming. You guys are awesome. And everyone clapped and cheered for me as if I was Rachel Hollis. The energy was crazy. I hugged Hina and went back to sit in my chair, and if that wasn't incredible enough, the most amazing thing happened next.

I sat down, and another woman raised her hand. Hina asked her if she had a question, to which the woman replied, no. I'd like to offer Val her first speaking engagement.

I know, right? And that woman, my friends, was Sandra Chuma. And the speaking engagement that she was speaking of was the Woman on Fire Summit that we are all presently at right now. I'm still pinching myself.

So, my friends, I'm here today to tell you that if you want to change your life, if you want to get a hold of your dreams and make them reality, then you have to take action. You need to define what your dream is. You need to share it with others. You need to do whatever it takes to help that dream come into fruition. And you need to stay committed to yourself and make your dreams a priority. You might be thinking to yourself, well, this is a nice story, but it's really just a happy coincidence that I was there in the right place at the right time.

And that may be true, but people, if I hadn't consumed all the information done, all of the exercises, stayed consistent, worked with my coach on defining my goals, put myself in an environment with like-minded people who shared my vision, I would never have been asked to step on that stage, and I would never have gotten the opportunity to stand on this one. So I challenge you today to take action, commit to a goal, and share it with as many people as possible, because the more people you share it with, the more likely you are to make yourself accountable and the more likely you are to do the work, and therefore, the more likely it's going to become your reality. Plus, you never know who's listening and might want to help you.

I'd like to finish off by thanking Sandra Chuma for this amazing opportunity. I am forever grateful.

And in the words of Steve Maraboli, take action. An inch of movement will bring you closer to your goals and a mile of intention. Thank you all for coming. You guys are awesome!”

So that was the speech that I was going to give in 2020, but I didn't get to give it because of the pandemic. Unfortunately, the event was canceled. I wanted to share the speech anyways because I feel the message is so important. You can fantasize all you want about what you desire, but that won't necessarily make it happen. You need to take action in order to get what it is that you want.

So I wanted to help you with this, so I'm going to share a few things you can do to make taking action a little bit easier.

5 STRATEGIES TO HELP YOU:

The first thing you can do is get started, determine what it is that you desire, and start taking steps towards your goals right away. Don't think about it. Don't try to perfect it. Just get going. Try not to worry about making a mistake because let's face it, mistakes are inevitable and often they're the best teachers. If you do make a mistake, so what? Who cares? You're the only person worried about how bad it will be if you do make a mistake. What would your best friend tell you? They’d tell you to get up and try again. Each mistake gets you closer to your goals, so go after it.
The second thing you can do is figure out your why. Why do you want to achieve this goal? Is it to help your family? Is it to feel a certain way? Is it to make an impact on the world? Whatever it is, stay connected to it, because it will give you the motivation that you need to keep going on the days that you don't feel like taking action.
The third thing you can do is ask yourself what kind of person you need to be in order to achieve the goal and then act as if you are already that person. For example, if you wanted a raise at work, you'd make sure that your performance warrants a pay raise. And if you have to, you'd ask to be compensated for your efforts. You wouldn't just trek along like everyone else and hope and pray that in time you'll be given a raise. You have to take action toward what it is you want. Ideally, obviously, it would be nice if your hard work was recognized and you were rewarded accordingly. But it doesn't always work out that way. And so you can't just throw your hands up in the air. You have to go after what it is you want.
The fourth thing you can do is make a commitment to yourself and keep it. One of my coaches always says……you don't get six-pack abs by hitting the gym once. You need to keep at it. I love that analogy because it really hits home the point. Keep taking action towards your goal until you achieve it. And if you need help with keeping commitments to yourself, check out the book The 5 Second Rule by Mel Robbins. I'll link it in the show notes. She does a really great job of outlining some strategies you can use to force yourself to take action.
And then the last thing you can do is you can review your goal every day and every night so that you keep it top of mind. That way you're more likely to continue to take action toward achieving it.

Okay, so the key takeaway I want you to remember through all of this is that reading books, attending classes and lectures, and studying is not enough to get where you want to go. You absolutely have to take action, however small the action is. With each action, you'll be one step closer to the end result.

Keep going until the desired goal is achieved, and then once you've achieved your goal, start with the next one.

That's all I got for now. Peeps. If you want more in-depth strategies on how to achieve your goals, or even figure out what your big goals are and how to stay committed to them, and then learn behaviors that will ensure that you stay on track, I invite you to look into an intensive program that I'm currently taking with multi-millionaire Kathleen Cameron. I'll share the link to the program in the show notes. It's a serious game changer, and it has helped me not only achieve some of my goals, but become a much happier person.

Thank you so much for listening. Until next time, I wish you all the best in turning your dreams into action. Ciao for now.

Thanks so much for listening to the Lessons on Happiness podcast. If you'd like to know more about the information I'm sharing or how I become a happier person, check out the show notes, reach out to me on social or email me at val@valmalnar.com.

My goal is to help as many people as possible live happier lives. So if you've enjoyed this episode, please take a screenshot and share it on Social and tag @valmalnar so that we can reach far and wide. I'd also love your feedback, so please leave a review so that I can be sure to create more content that is helpful and resonates with you.

Thanks again for tuning in, and until next time, wishing you happy vibes and big strides.

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I also want to invite you to download my free, and recently updated (September 13, 2022), Start Happy Stay Happy Journal that I created to help you start each day off right to help increase your likelihood of success.

I hope we can connect in a deeper way. If you have any questions about any of the information I'm sharing please send me a message and I'll be happy to help.

Sending love and hugs,